It's been a while
since my last posting, so I decided to write a post on my pregnancy, it coming
to an end and about to start something amazing, so I’ve heard! I cannot believe
how quickly this pregnancy has gone by. I remember very vividly the night that
I took a pregnancy test, looked at the results, shook my head because there is
no way I could be pregnant (or so I thought), took another pregnancy test, shook my head in disbelief and took another
one, and then screamed to Kyle that we are pregnant. I actually am still in
disbelief that there is a little human being inside of me right now. It’s kind
of like thinking about the Gospel and those three common questions “Where did
we come from?” “Why are we here?” and “Where do we go after this life?” the
more you think of it and the harder you try to understand exactly how we got
here and exactly where we are going after, the more your brain hurts. Every
single time I feel our little boy kick me or roll around I can’t help but think
that he is literally a miracle in the making! (I hope that makes as much sense
in your head as it does in mine). My pregnancy has been an amazing
experience. I have heard so many horror stories about what could go wrong while
being pregnant and I feared that I would experience something like that. But
no, from the moment we found out we were pregnant to the present moment (almost
38 weeks) there have been no complications which is also another miracle and
something that I am very grateful for!
The beginning of
my pregnancy was kind of on the harder side because I was sick for about 4
weeks, but honestly looking back on it, it doesn’t seem like 4 weeks it seems
like maybe 4 days. Once I was over the morning sickness part of pregnancy, most
days I forgot that I was even pregnant. To be honest, I was still in denial of
even being pregnant up until our 20 week ultrasound because I wasn’t gaining
any weight and I didn’t have a little baby bump. So it was hard for me to think
that I was pregnant because everything was normal. I have heard from many
pregnant women their weird cravings and stuff, but I think the weirdest thing I
“craved” would be crunchy fruits and vegetables, but it was only for 2-3 weeks
maybe and I didn’t necessarily crave them. If it was in front of me, I’d eat it,
but I wouldn’t go out of my way to get something crunchy. After our 20 week
ultrasound I slowly started gaining weight and eventually I got a baby bump. (see
pic below)
Can I be honest?
If I’m a little too honest and you get offended, then you are more than welcome
to just exit out of my blog J but here’s my thoughts on weight. My
entire life I have been fortunate enough to never have weight issues or
problems (thanks to my mother and father) so I never really could connect with
those girls or women who didn’t fit into a “socially acceptable size.” We see
ads all over the place from TV commercials to Billboards to magazines that show
what women should look like, what “being beautiful is,” and how to get that kind of body. Honestly we
are brainwashing our kids (and even ourselves) to not love their bodies and how
God created them until they get that “perfect” body that was spray painted on
that billboard. Ever since I got pregnant and started gaining weight, I have
been able to look in the mirror every day and see myself, for the first time in
my life, with curves. At first it was hard because that’s not “pretty” right?
And yes yes yes I know, I am pregnant but I have put that aside a few times and
looked at myself as if I wasn’t pregnant. I honestly envy those women who have
curves. I would like to speak to the person who came up with the idea that
skinny, boney woman are more socially acceptable then curvy women. I have
absolutely loved seeing my body with curves. It makes me feel more like a woman
should look like! I wish that our world wasn’t so screwed up and we could see
those ads that were shown back in the 40’s that showed “real women”, curvy bodies
and bodies that weren’t perfectly sculpted. Well so what I’m getting at is that
I want to tell all of you woman who have possibly had weight issues, or height
issues, or any issue… you are beautiful just the way you are! It’s definitely
easier said than done to “love yourself the way you are” because we are
surrounded by pictures of women who are so perfect that we would do anything to
look like them, whether that be starve ourselves or work ourselves to death at
the gym. I think that having curves has made me look healthier, happier, and surprisingly
more comfortable with my body and how I look. Okay, okay I’m done… I’m stepping
down off my soapbox but I just wanted to throw that out there and my feelings
on that subject.
Ok back to pregnancy…
so ya it’s been great! Right now we are 37 weeks and 4 days along. I constantly
have either feet, knees or a butt under my ribs… did I mention constantly? It’s
an awesome feeling though. I know that our little man is gaining weight and he’s
preparing to enter into this dysfunctional world. I have been having those fake
contractions (braxton-hicks?) for about 2 months now. At first I was only
getting them about 4-5 times a day and now I get at least one every hour.
Every single
night, right before I fall asleep, he gets the hiccups. It’s cute in an
annoying way. I love feeling his little hiccups but they last FOREVER! It’s
like a twitch that doesn’t stop. But it’s cute. Being a very anxious person,
you’d think that I would be having anxiety attacks just thinking about the
labor process and what’s going to happen, but I feel like I have been very
fortunate to get an AMAZING doctor who has calmed those nerves! Her name is Dr.
Falk; she works at the new hospital over in Park City. If it weren’t for her, I
feel like this baby might already be born because of stress. Right after we
found out that we were pregnant, I had heard about this Dr. Falk lady and how
good she was, and so that’s why we went with her. It’s been amazing to hear how
many people go to her once they start talking to me and asking who my doctor is
and stuff.
Well that’s
pretty much an overview of my feelings and such in the past 8 months. Kyle and
I are so excited to meet and hold our little man here in the next few weeks. We
feel like we are prepared, but I don’t know if you can ever be 100% prepared.
Wish us luck!!